Summertime fun fun fun

Got home to many messages. Two alone form DXH. He finally gave in and gave me the flight information, all the while questioning my abilities to handle email. He's using his right to access the children extra by requesting the children three days early for "a family event".

I sent back an acknowledgement under one email, then realized that "hey wait a minute, you've got to tell me where the children are going to be as it's more than 72 hours that they'll be out of the city". So off that email went. (While I felt I was rather business like requesting the flight information per the arbitrated agreement, he was bad-dog, shove-your-nose-in-it-I-want-you-to-do-this-and-this.) Perhaps I'm too sensitive.

I'm looking for this month to be over.

Cat spray and fun

DH is currently trying to hunt down where one of the cats *might* have sprayed. Then again, it might be the Pee Pee trees which stink like cat spray when their bloomed branches are brought in for decoration. We just had a big rain, so that might be the answer. Peeuuu.

So ends my night. Prior to that I got a curious question for DH asking about post-partem depression. He was wondering if I was having some of that. Hmmm. Let's see. CU-1 and 2 are scheduled to be MIA for a good part of June and most of July. They're here for the week. Growning up way to fast, and I miss them. Miss who they were. (It's bitter-sweet to watch CU-3 and 4. I'm moving into unchartered territory with them; stuff I've only seen in part with the older CUs. It kind of suks.

But, sadness aside, it was a great weekend. CU-2 did a lot of Brownie activities, preceeded by a family birthday part for her, (she'll be at her Father's for her b-day) and followed by her best-friend's birthday party. CU-1 had his vernisage and made some incredible art. He also played a lot with a kid from down the block. The heat helped break the ice, so to speak. A lot of water was used and a lot of fun was had.

CU-3 enjoyed her "moutain". CU-4 got the raw end of the stick. Though he had some amazing naps while Maman overcame power tool fears. (That DH then took apart most of what she did and redid it again, didn't help for the morale, but that's for another entry.)

Ladadada di, ladadada da

So we've got a functional powder room, laundry room and kitchen. The CUs have functional bedrooms (and are actually quite close to being settled). We have half a bathroom (toilet and tub, but no sink upstairs). DH and I get to do some in-door camping. Laying down the hauling-up the matress and box spring on a nightly basis. The front room is still in squalor.

We also have a huge hole in the soon-to-be master bedroom and en suite. We're unlikely to be hole-less in the next couple of weeks while there's a re-order of our theraputic tub. (I sure hope it listens well and provides good advice!)

The outside is starting to shape up a bit. The fence posts for 6 of the 9 fence holes are in until we hit pay dirt, which, if the schedule holds, should be tomorrow morning, sometime between 7 and 10! 10 cubic square yards of beautiful black gold. Wahoo. CU-4 and I will play in the yard a bit while I put up fence rails and pester DH to do another run out to the Home Depot for the other bits and bobs.

And more good news. Our shed is finally in, which means that that might take some of the strain off our DN's (Dear Neighbor's) garage. (Seeing as they're moving in two months, we kind of have to get the lead out too.)

This might be a fortunate weekend for us after all!

Enquiring minds want to know

Oh there is so much I want to know.

The first is why DXH would possibly think I wpould accept his partner's opinion on parenting our children.

The current situation involves CU-2 who wants to get her ears pierced. Ordinarily, I would expect that to be a mother-daughter activity, not a heavily tatooed/pierced guy step-parent-step daughter kind of thing to do. I don't care for the type of jewelry partner of DXH has picked out. I know I don't want him to guide my daughter in those types of decisions.

So, on go the emails, back and forth, back and forth with partner trying to get me to say yes. Me saying, "I kind of need to hear of the intentions of her father", something I've said all along. My concern is that some one in the other home is going to think differently, and "just do it". DH says that there is little recorse that wouldn't harm the child. Yup. Another fun thing for DXH to run roughshod over, and me just to sit by and let it happen and except the suckage.

The only time, these days, that I get to hear from DXH is when he's bullying me into something he wants. Shortly, he's to take a continental visit with CU-1 and 2. He's given me the destination information, but not the method. Seeing as it's unlikely they're going to swim or drive, there is a slight obligation that he provide this information to me before I release travel documents. He's already expressed disappointment that I've not provided the documenation he's requested on his terms. I've replied in kind, that there seemed to be an oversight of information, and he may wish to do that prior to my hand over. Nothing from him equals nothing from me. Looks like we might be headed towards a Mexican stand-off.

So, this leads me to the next issue that's still light-years away. CU-1 graduates from his current school in two years. Where will he go to next. What fires are yet to be flamed on this one?

Uncle

Uncle. Aunt. And all the cousins. I'm throwing in the towel. I'm running up the white flag. God grant me peace.

I'm giving up trying to figure out what the construction schedule, CU-4's poop cycle, my work project objectives, and my teeth are all doing. Seems that there is a conspiracy here to keep me guessing. Well, it's working really well.

On the construction side of things, we actually had partial movement here today with the flooring for the upstairs bathroom going down, the taps to the shower in, the toilet installed. BUT, and of course there's a but, the sink from the downstairs bathroom wasn't installed. Huh.

CU-4. He was on a three day cycle. Today, while waiting for the #14, I thought this lady was letting off a lot of gas. Two-cheek-sneaks, my sister calls them. Until .... I picked up CU-4. The mother-load. Man can that baby off-gas.

Ok. Bad bad bad bad choice for me to keep the work project. Every time I try to heave it off, it comes back, like 1970s fashion.

And then there's my teeth. Just when I thought I saw the light at the end of the tunnel regarding my teeth (I've had five visits to the dentist this year alone), turns out I have to get yet another crown, as I've broken another tooth.

Three letter acronym of the day that describes all this: WTF.

Time stands still

Three not-so-tiny voices are blaring in the background, covered by the not-so-soft snores of the fourth. It's bed time for my Bonzos and CU-3 is driving us all around the bend. She's being so three.

DH is hammering away at the floor. He's got one more hour until the noise cut-off. It'll be time to switch gears to help me clear out the old kitchen and bathroom for tomorrow's run at construction.

The old dishwasher has gone off to it's new home, there are more and more stacks of stuff in the front room. I keep wondering how long it will be until the dream becomes less and less frettful.

Tomorrow is Monday, and the regular race begins for every one else. I've been on the tredmill for such a long time already.

Two my two mothers - your cards are coming. They've just got into the mail a bit later then usual.

Chicka chicka quack quack

I've got an ear worm thanks to a status of a friend on Yahoo.

I can't place "chicka chicka quack quack". I know it's on TV some where. After several weeks of renovation nights (which translates to going to bed around midnight e-v-e-r-y n-i-g-h-t, and bytheway, the counters have been delivered), it just sounds like a nice word.

The children ask me with the peanut butter is -- "Chicka chick quack quack" I respond.

Maybe my extraordinary behavior is ordinary now, as they just shrug their shoulders and walk away.

Withdrawl

I'm going through withdrawl again. Perpetual Chocoholic and my schedules this week have clashed and we've not been able to meet up for coffee all week. Wahh.

Things have been moving at a hectic pace. DH and I have been running the construction marathon every night until midnight in order to be one step ahead of the crew that's scheduled to come in the next morning. We're so close to being done on the kitchen and upstairs bedroom side of the project, that we don't want to loose momentum.

On top of that, trying to even carry my project on a part time basis, with a very alert CU-4 is just not working. I'm hoping that I can start to ball rolling this morning to get the project transfered to the understudy. Regretably, the Project Manager is off site until next week. I'll be going into work to talk to the understudy to give the old "heads-up".

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I've got a shopping list to attend to - it's a subdued pizza night Friday with our good neighbors putting their house up for sale (and them vacating for the weekend to near-by relatives). Add to that, the usual detritus of running a household (laundry, bills, library books to go back ....). I think I deserve the grey hairs that are coming in much more rampently.

Coming together

I've been slow to post. If you got a good look at my hands, you'd see them speckled with various colours of paint.

I've been painting all the new walls to beat the band. Between that, and a short bout of the flu, muscle aches, a bit of arthritus, and a couple of hours working on a work project, things have just got in the way of posting the silly bits of life.

Doesn't help that I've been crabby. Stressed. Things are coming together on the house reno. The bits and bobs that are still outstanding are starting to stress me as I'm the one who "dresses" the house, and I want to get at it. I've been stopped by different bits (ungrouted tile, kitchen cabinets that have had to be reordered, errands that have to be run) to really move this project forward. Meanwhile, the continued collection of stuff in anticipation for the house, and the continual moving of other bits and pieces into the remaining part of the house that is not currently under construction is adding to the pile.

Notice to the universe: I *am* greatful for your blessings. Keep 'em coming. I'll get through this.

Smells like teen spirit

DH is on the road for about half of this week. That's unusal as for the last five years or so, we've spent perhaps less then a week, in total, apart. As all you who read this blog with any kind of regularity will note, I've been feeling a bit stressed out. His being away doesn't change the situation that much (or so I'd like to think. I *used* to be able to be a fully functional grown, single Mom for a number of years.)

I feel like when I got married, I got stupider. Stupider in that I've started to actually trust again, and rely on another individual to take on certain tasks and support the running of the household.

I'm starting to really realize how far I've relaxed with DH in my life. CU-4 took almost no naps today (I'm feeling it as I needed the nap) and I could have used the extra pair of hands so that I could sneak in a 15 minute power nap tonight. I could have also used the extra brain to help process laundry correctly. As is, my senses (five plus one) were working overtime saying "Don't do it. Don't do it. "

Let me bck up a bit. CU-3 was having a difficult diaper free day. She had had several accidents at school, so there was laundry to do. I managed to sneak to the cave to run laundry before she noticed my momentary disappearance. (Who says parenting isn't magical).

A friend stopped by, so I borrowed her superpowers of watching children to run downstairs to switch the laundry around. My sense of smell said there was something wrong. The laundry didn't have the proper fresh laundry smell. I thought the laundry just needed a tumble in the dryer and all would be better. So I put it to the dryer and squeezed through another load of laundry into the washer.

A couple of hours later, when the house was quieter and lunches were prepared, I crept downstairs to get the fresh laundry out of the dryer. The improper smell was still there. So I shrugged and thought I'd better rerun that load. I did the wet versus dry laundry square dance, with laundry trading places. As I did so, there was a super clean turd that fell out of the laundry.

Squick.

Oh the stories of motherhood. Give me a couple of years and I'll actually own up to the story.

Right

I'd been partying way to long -- having a pity party that is.

Grandma C was right about her comments. Yesterday _was_ a special day with so many opportunities. Her comment kind of shook me up to start seeing the adventure in the day again.

Today is a new day. Workers are back on site. I've posted a first rough draft of my work project to the Project Manager for comments. It's not snowing. CU-4 is still just as snuffly as me and has begun to coo. He's charming.

Cuddle time.

Blowing chunks

As of late, all my blog posts have been a rant on stresses of one kind or another. Of that, I am not proud. However, as I have so few readers, my ranting is ok. It's almost like peeping into my diary, without having to search between the matresses.

Today was another stressed day.

It started off with waking up to this:

Followed by wet, wet and more wet. CU-3 was well off in her rain boots, and CU-4 was firmly strapped to my chest; a position he's been privledged to hold now for almost 12 months.

We got about a block from home when I had to save Santa from the mongo pile, and truck him back home. It just wouldn't do to have to carry three to school. And I just don't know how I would have explained his presence to Perpetual Chocoholic.

So truck back we did, and then really headed off into the 60 m/h winds. Wet snow and rain making CU-4 breath deep enough for both of us.

Made our slow assent to the school and caught up with CU-2 who was released from the bowels of XDH's van. CU-1 didn't bother to come out as he was engrossed in the portable television. (I do so love XDH's parenting style. And he lectures me. Sigh.)

Had a wee chat with CU-2 and then dropped off CU-3. She was very happy to show off her chosen book on bebits. Happy happy thing.

Treked over to the coffee shop for my now usual Monday morning ritual and waited. I figured I'd probably not be seeing PC this morning. When it gets to greasy out, she shows she's the logical one and calls to cancel. CU-4 and I had a love in (cuddle), under the watchful evil eye of this dude sitting in the corner trying to do a cross word. I watched him and he evil-eyed me when CU-4 let out a squalk of discomfort as I was adjusting his sitting place. (It wasn't his usual set of trees he gets to look at and I didn't have him held just-so so that he could adjust to the new surroundings.)

We wandered home, at a casual pace, getting spashed from boot to thigh by kindly drivers, to no work men. Sigh.

CU-4 and I curred up against one another for a nappy, feeling tired from the weird dreams of the night before. We drifted. Him more fitfully then me. I eventually got up to tend to my anxieties about a work project that's not done yet and must be attended to before the end of the month. (End of the week would be so much better.)

Telephone calls, baby wails, fatigue. That was the afternoon.

Outside it was better. No snow. Now rain. CU-4 and I both find solitude outside. I love the rain of April and May.

I **** the new Blogger!

Arg. 15 minutes out of my life doesn't seem like much, except when I should be getting ready for church.

I just fought with Google and Blogger to try to get access to this account, and to post some new stories. It's been a comedy of errors (email was down for 24 hours, and I was in an evil cycle of trying to remember my password to this blog, and couldn't. ARG!)

DH is packing up to head to the big city for three days and I've been in a low-level panic. Couldn't post. Lost stories and now have CU-3 and 4 to attend to during the day which might make me slower to post at night! Argh.

Here, there and every where

"****'s house of pain." That's how my neighbor once answered my telephone for me. (It was DH's regular hour to call, so no harm was done.)

It seems that I'm in a rant mood lately. DH was telling family stories at work, and some of his coworkers are nurses who started to toy with the idea of post-partum depression. DH replied. "No. I don't think so. She's usually like this."

Stresses of life. Stresses of running a household. My hat is off to any one who decides to tackle the detritus of family life full-time. I've said this again and again to my coworkers: "I'd rather be here." Here being work. It's sooooo much easier then being a domestic god/dess.

Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying not having to listen to customer complaints for this year off. I know I'll look back on this time away with longing. It's the whole while-in-the-thick-of-it that's getting to me.

I once heard another parent say to their nagging child "This is an opportunity to try to exercise patience." I keep telling myself that, and "this too shall pass".

Oooh. Sounds like workmen are back on site!

Oh drat. Just CU-2, home sick from school, using the electrical pencil sharpener.

House bound

It's Easter Monday and the children are all stir crazy, except for little CU-4 who is sitting in the eye of the storm watching it all with an entertained and bewildered look on his face.

I've already chewed my way through several kick-lines of Peeps rabbits in an effort to self-medicate myself to a level of feeling something other then nothing.

The weather's been unusually chilly which just adds to the mix of cabin fever, and potty training efforts that are being met with mild success, when a toilet is near.

The units are jumping up and down and thudding about just about as much as the guys on the roof. They're back to do the front of the house which means that the children have a real reason to stay in side (physical safety), though telling the children big snow flakes are falling (roofing materials being dropped to the ground) has served as a mild form of entertainment.

> Enter explective here <

Apparently DH reads this blog from time-to-time to gauge how things are going in my head. He thinks he can get insite into what's going on when I go off the deep end.

Currently we're both absolutely stressed out.

We finally got a notice from the hydro company saying that we failed the electrical inspection for the new addition. Add that I've not really seen him for the last two weeks (he's been in the addition or dungeon working on fixing the part of the electrical that failed (S2 staples versus S1 staples. Who knew.) Heap on a missing receipt worth about $80 to be able to return electrical box extensions, screwy IKEA wall-mount lights, four children, two weeks of laundry, below average weather, a birthday party, homework and Easter, plus a looming deadline for work = one stressed out Maman and Papa with little relief in site.

I'm thinking that it's still easier to build then to move.

This too shall pass.

And so it goes

I just spent another fourty minutes of my life on the telephone doing an intake/observations session regarding support for CU-1. I can't help getting the feeling of deja vu all over again. It's like the intake workers don't read other's notes, and/or are looking for consistancies of stories in asking the same questions over and over again.

I have feelings of great sadness after these sessions. I feel like "here we go again", and that there's not a lot of sympathy or understanding to go around. I repeat the same story and nothing changes. People will go about and do what *they* think is right. So, in the end I say "Listen to the school's comments. They're having the most difficulty with his child. Do what needs to be done to support them, and I'll tow the line at home." It seems like the path of least resistance. And, besides, CU-1 spends most of his day there, why not conform. (It's all a bit 1984ish isn't it?)

On an equally depressive note, I got an email this morning from DH who got a note from the contractor's project manager saying things were behind by a week and one of the elements I was looking for is out of budget and we need to look at option A or B. (Why this wasn't pointed out at the begining of the project, or even earlier then today, I don't know. Perhaps this is fairly typical of project management.)

I think it's suffice to say that I'm getting frustrated. Perhaps it's because I'm a high-end communicator. I do it for a living. I like to know information is available. Perhaps I set my hopes (not expectations, they're set way too low) way to high on everything.

Oh well. This too shall pass.

It's 4:30 p.m and all is quiet

Well, relatively quiet. I *just* woke up from a much needed nappy.

CU-3 is out as well as CU-4. DH is making his way across town to pick-up a potentially new-to-us mattress from a Freecycle. I'm hoping it works out as ours has seen better days (and the conception of five children).

As DH said upon going to bed last night "I sure hope this one doesn't have me rolling toward the middle!"

I'm hoping for a lot of noise this week. We're coming down to the final five weeks of the NDIY (
NOT do-it yourself) project. Insulation, windows, drywall, flooring and roofs are all slated for this short week. The current forecast says it'll be raining men! Halleluiah!

Bring it on boys. Bring it on!

Feast or famine

It seems to be feast or famine over in this end of town. I'm missing out on PCs company as one of her CUs hit the skids and is house bound for the week.

I know I'll catch up with the details next week. The funny thing is I know I didn't give up chocolate for Lent!

Stuffed

Well, it's not like the shite has hit the fan, in so many words, it just feels like it.

March is usually a blah month for me, and it's continuing to be so.

Being on maternity leave, I thought, silly me, that things would be merry and bright and sunshine and roses. The closest I've come to roses is a bed of thorns.

In relation to world problems, mine are slight and certainly self-inflicted. They're there nonetheless, and, well, for several, time is the only thing to heal.

In the meantime, weather is turning up, which to me, might be a good thing, if I could just motivate myself to put down the fork and take a handful of CUs with me and go for a walk instead of forcing down my feelings, and self-medicating with Girl Guide Cookies. (Having 28 cartons in the house isn't helping either.)

Sad

Today I got a call from my X-DH's partner asking for CU-2's passport information. From previous conversations with CU-2, I've been told of her other parent's pending re-nuputuals this summer and the yearly promise to visit another continent. Apparently this year it might actually be true.

The telephone conversation was mildly distrubing for one reason, X-DH wasn't making the call. He almost never does. Everything is passed through the non-legal non-custodial step parent. Makes me wonder who is more important, his feelings or his children. Actually, I don't think I wonder any more.

At the end of the conversation, partner got the information he needed to make the arrangements for the trip. No offer to tell me when or where. I decided I could have asked, but I would have risked getting told some choice words, so why bother. It will all come out in due time.

On a similar wave length, I was reading in the news, the story of a young girl who was held, not on her own accord, for three months, and finally got away. As I read the details of the abuse, I thought that the techniques used are not that different from what my CUs have experienced. And so I worry. (I've been told my worries are misplaced.)

Which leads me to what I've been wanting to blog about (just to get it out of my head). Every night that my CUs are not home, I put the porch light on. Every night they are home, the light is turned off. CUs if you ever read this, know that this tradition will go on. There's a place for you here. Always. No matter what. Je t'aime.

All's well that ends well

I wish I could say all is well here. One word: bickering.

My MOL once referred to us as the Bickersons - as in a family name. How fitting is that for us.

We had a ray of sunshine earlier last week when hell froze over and my DXH sent through CU-1 and 2s report cards. It was significant permafrost here when CU-1s grades came back stronger then the first term. Praise the Saints!

For a whole 24 hours every one woke up happy. Down right chipper. Then back to cloud cover, as usual.

We're under a lot of stress from a significant household renovation. DH is, well, probably scared shitless spending this amount of money, especially considering within the last three years we'd seriously had to consider visiting our local food bank. (For us, things tend to go bust, bust, bust or boom, but in a bad way. So far, things have been holdering their own though, and I'm not trying to court troubles. My psoriasis is going over time on me, which means I must be super stressed out too. The last time things flared up this badly was during "The Troubles" when DXH and I were too close to tango and were in the heat of a mediated (dis)agreement.)

I'm hoping this too will pass. We've got probably another six weeks on the build (from the project plan we've received), and then it's time to put the house back together.

Framed!

We've been framed! At least there's been a start to framing of the addition. We had three guys wacking away at wood from 7:30 this morning to late into the afternoon.

(This is the third wall going up.)

I poked around the site upon coming home this evening. It feels so little. DH keeps telling me to keep the faith, that it'll be worthwhile.

I hope I believe him.

And so it begins, take two

I've been doing a lot of grousing at this end of things. My poor DH has had to hear me go on and on and on about the slow start to the construction project. Stuff beyond my control in this relationship (weather for example) has slowed the start.

I woke up to a lot of banging this morning with DH breaking Rule #1 to tell me the guys were outside working on the framing.

[Insert sound of record needle being dragged over an old LP.]

DH just came in to pick up his work stuff after dropping CU-3 off at school. "Too cold" he announces between an icicle incrusted mustache.

Apparently the guys are doing some prep. work only (cutting down the TechnoPosts) and then are shutting down the site. (-43 F with the wind chill is a bit, um, brisk I'll admit). They'll try again tomorrow.

Good for them. Bad for me. I'm getting cabin fever. TV is becoming a bunch of repeats. I've almost caught up on all the laundry (there's just no place to put it away). I'm loosing the larger brain cells that drive the interest to read, or write long prose. (I suspect it's lack of fresh air and sunshine because of the lousey weather.)

Maybe I should throw a party. Lots of whine and cheese here! ;-)

The little shit

Baby, if you haven't noticed yet, it's cold outside. Today has been identified as perhaps the second coldest day of this week. Possibly this month. To that end, our dear LS (little shit, aka CU-3) decided to use her *magic finger* to slide the crucial piece of steel from one side to the other, thus locking her dear parents on one side of the door, while she and CU-4 were snuggly on the other side.

Thanks to her Maman's ingenuity, and Papa's ability to execute good ideas, we all are back on the same side of the door now. CU-3 is a little bit unhappy about this, for many many reasons.

It's midnight and all is well

No snow yet, though the wind is definitely picking up. I'm kind of hoping for a snow day. I haven't had one of those in several years. Regretably, if it comes to fruition, CU-1 and 2 will only be around for part of the day. It's cross-over day.

Speaking of cross-over - I'd like to introduce another blog I spy. I spy is my virtual gallery. A bit of virtual exhibitionism. I'm hoping to post regularly to this site, much like Daily Dose of Imagery but I'm less inclined to learn all the ins and outs of technology to show things off like he does.

Winter, take two

Earlier this week I suggested Spring might be just around the corner. Well, maybe not. Currently, we're under a severe weather warning for snow and snow and a bit more snow just to be sure.

I believe the saying for March was in like a lion, out like a lamb?

We'll see if Mother Nature actually brings her full furry down on us for daring to think that we might be done with the snow gear for another year.

Spring is just around the corner

And so it begins

We've just started our reconstruction process and already it feels like it's slipping away from us financially.

I heard about people's project costs doubling. I'd been warned about extended time lines. What none of these fair weather warners didn't say was that it was self-inflicted.

DH and I went through the contract again. This time with a much more level head. We'd talked pie-in-the-sky when we first opened up the Medussa's box, hoping for the world.

Our contractor is good, fair and honest. That's on the plus side.

Costs of materials keep rising. That's on the negative side.

Our hopes and dreams (but not expectiations) are like a thong. Stuck in the middle.

This morning DH broke Rule #1 (for those of you who don't know or don't choose to remember, rule #1 is NEVER, EVER wake a sleeping woman) to tell me he got an update on the costs of three new windows as per the change request we were looking into. Three grand. I was awake faster then a double-espresso could shake me.

After a few mental explicatives, I started to do the math, knowing how limited our "extras" budget was. Where to cut, what to cut so that it makes a difference. (We've already commited to putting down our own floors in an effort to save some bling and flip it over to the fancy bathtub DH wants, and I've already poo pooed upgrading the hot water tank as a forced economy.)

Oh the joys joys joys of renovations.

Priceless

As posted on PostSecret this week:

I was having a bad day at work last week. I hoped my husband might send me some flowers to cheer me up but I know he’s busy right now. So I called the florist, ordered a bunch of flowers and had them delivered to his office. The card read “give these to your wife, she’s having a bad day.” The florist laughed, and so did my husband.

Uncle, aunt and all the extended family

I'm ready to say uncle.

For years I've been downplayings the challenges of having children. Today I'm 'fessing up saying that four is enough. At least four under the age of 18 and still living at home.

My day started off with CU-1 raising the dead (basically every one else in the house who happened to be sleeping) at 5:30 a.m. That's not too bad for most except I went to bed well after midnight, and CU-3 starts to act up when she's tired, and CU-2 just gets really really cranky.

After coralling and separating the children (the swimmers versus the non-swimmers), I went with the swimmers because it was "Bring a parent to class day". I hope the CUs realized how important it was that 1. I wore a bathing suit (a first in over 10 months), 2. I actually got into the water (I don't like getting cold or wet).

We were lucky and got buses both ways (which reduced the "why don't we have a car, I don't want to walk" conversations). DH was thankful for the extra pair of hands. I kept him busy though, as if he was attached to a bungy cord.

He just gets in the door, and then he's off with CU-2 for a birthday party and a quick groccery pick-up.

While he's off having a few minutes to himself, I'm at home with CU-1, 3 and 4. CU-1 and 3 have found sticks and are doing what kids do with sticks, CU-4 is doing what CU-4s of his age do best.

Me, I started thinking that four is enough.

For today.

Maybe.

Ok, so tell me how you really feel aka potty talk

As you know, we're having some work done on our home. This means that some things are getting displaced, and there's a bit of banging going on.

I thought it was CU-4 and I who would have to deal with the brunt of it all. Not so. There are the catz.

Big Purr has handled the changes the best, hanging out in the bathroom (next to the heater), frosting the towels for us. (It's ever so nice to get out of the shower/bath, to grab a nice, warm, furry towel. Share the love with us Purr. Share the love.)

Papa le chat had a few adjustment problems as well. When the new stairs came in, he wandered around in a big circle. Going down the old stairs and up the new. At least this one found the cat box.

Can't say that for André, aka the harp seal. He's having the hardest time of it all. At an over-the-top, over weight 17 lber, he still manages to waddle around and find the sunny spots. The construction's got him a little confused though. In the last two days, he's refused to go down the new stairs to the boxes at the landing. I figure it's been two days only by the volumenous dump he did in a file box containing project notes!

Thank you for your comments André.

Don't ask if you really don't want to know

The conversation went like this:

"Is this DH?"

"No. He's a work."

"Is this Mrs. DH?"

"Yeesss?"

"This is Claudine from The Sun."

Oh oh. Not again.

"Do you read The Sun?"

"Noooo."

"Would you be interested in subscribing to The Sun for 25 cents a day?"

"Noooo."

"Oh? Why is that?"

"I don't like the paper and wouldn't wrap fish in it."


I find our local papers a bit much to take. They've got strong political leanings and each has its own problem as a media from which to gain information about my community. I don't subscribe to either. ;-)

Tasty

Finger lickin' good. Lip smakin'. These are terms I'd never have used to describe ... myself.

Today I discovered that I was both of these. After a significant feed this morning, CU-4 turned away with a very smug and satisified look and smacked those little lips.

Later, while I was pinned down giving CU-4 yet another top-up, CU-3 decided to give my hair a spit shine. Yah. It goes like this:

1. Spit into hand.
2. Whipe genetically lubricated hand into Mama's hair.
3. Repeat until Mama calls Papa for back-up.

Well, I've always wanted to be wanted, my children just give a whole new twist to the definition.

Fatigue

I don't get it.

Before I left on my one year, self-induced exile, I implicity stated I was willing to do work (come into the office, or work from home.) Since then, I've repeated heard nothing from my manager(s), and I've heard through the grape vine that there's been lots of work, but that it keeps getting reassigned to other people. Sooo, what to do without sounding like spoiled grapes?

Well, one thing I'm doing is not going into the office. Out of sight, out of mind. The other thing I'm doing is hanging out at home, thinking about things. It seems that this thinking is hard work. Well, between that and CU-4 and my hanging together just is exausting. I'm finding that, oh, between 2 and 3:30 we tend to nod-off and miss some of the best televion (for example HGTV's I want that), though we have been getting up in just enough time to collect the assortment of siblings.

Perhaps it's just the weather and we're hibernating, or maybe it's my body catching up on all the sleep it missed for the previous four months.

Mother Nature's revenge

After all the warmth and cuddliness of the festive 14th, Mother Nature's coming back with a vengence. Nasty cold is hitting this area, and CU-1 and 2 are in mid-Winter Carnival mode with an outing plan today! CU-3 is warm and cozy at day care and CU-4 and I are hanging out in winter wear at home as J. aka "the gas man" looks at our heating and air return systems to reroute it because of our current state of construction.

On that side of things, we've been told that the tentative date of demolition is Monday! Woo hoo! Here's hoping I've got pictures to post by mid-morning.

Here's to *Friendship Day*

There's a move afoot to try to double-brand this day as Friendship Day (at least that's what Y TV has been dubbing it).

On one hand, I think it's all a bit silly. On the other hand, I think it's brilliant. I'm thinking it's a bit more balanced (though politically correct) approach to celebrating love in it's many forms (and not just those who happen to be coupled on this day).

So here's to you all - Happy Friendship Day. I certainly appreciate having you all as friends.


And a special thank you to PC and Grandma C for checking in today. I appreciated the visits.

Hurray for Grandma's baby bags!

Just a quick note to publicly thank Grandma C and her inspired baby bags. Used on CU-3, CU-4 is now currently enjoying the bag-and-back reactor-type activity that occurs in this item - just like a bag n'bake turkey! Keeps CU-4 nice and warm until done! (For me, that usually means about six to seven hours of sleep, glorious, glorious sleep).

Slow to post, AKA are blogs dead?

I kept telling myself that life really wouldn't change after CU-4's arrival. On one hand I was right, while in the other hand I'm holding a dirty diaper wondering what I've been doing with my time.

For those few who actually read this blog, you'll probably be thinking the same thing. Well, between napping and living the life of Riley, I've well, been napping, and doing a lot of paperwork to get this maternity leave off the ground. I've also been making a couple of dozen papier maché hearts for CU-1 to distribute at school (filled only (read cheap-ed out) Hershey Hugs and Kisses, shuffling my To Do list pile of papers from one side of the house to the other, and folding one half of the house into the other (the later is because construction started in earnest with the front hall closet becoming a large, though very temporary laundry shoot while we await new basement stairs to be put in).

Once Valentine's Day is through, I'll have SO MUCH more free time! ;-) So I might actually find the time to write the stories for the blog to share with everyone. That was the idea behind getting up and out of the house (in minus 13 degree weather no less!) to meet up with Perpetual Chocoholic. The goal, as hammered out in a coffee-drunken stooper last Thursday night, was to get each of us out of our perspective ruts, and to provide mutual support to attend to our more creative pursuits. PC was to work on illustrations, me on writing and research to further more photographic pursuits.

Our first time out the door (and into the local Bridgehead) didn't see much drawing, or planning, but a lot of talking. Though not our original intent, I think we've both found it to be unblocking. PC helped me realize that I really really was trying to talk myself out of putting forward a proposal for solo show. She also helped me see I need to pull that camera out and pursue the visions in my head and get them out onto [photographic] paper.

However, through that two hours of exploration of all things, we started on a discussion about blogging and wondering if it was dying. (Or maybe this discussion was from last Thursday.) In the back of my head, I was wondering if blogs and blogging had seen it's day. I've heard (before maternity leave when I was plugged in to the world much more) that there was newer, better technology that was being pursued. Not really being a definitive techy, and finding that I'm less and less interested in technology as each year passes, I kind of don't care about the changes and am quite satisified with this medium.

We'd discussed how some of the people she'd followed regularly were closing out their blogs. We mused about the life span of our own blogs and whether the time had come to put them to bed. I'm thinking no, this one still serves a purpose. I just need to get off my arse and start writing, as I find that writing keeps me sharper then just having these conversations in my head. They can be pretty one sided. So, during the next 49 weeks of forced time off, I'm hoping to write more, self-publish to here more. Read other blogs more. And respond more. Like PC points out in her studies of illustration, it's an exercise, and some times you have to force yourself to keep going.

Wait no more

After 20+ hours of labour CU-4 finally arrived with flurry and fanfair.

While I have several stories to write about, and debrief, document and mind dump, it seems that they're stuck in a place yet to be reached. It's not because of time, or interest, or the inability to sit for short period of time on hard surfaces. It's more related to the fact that I've been running around trying to get paperwork for the maternity leave addressed so that the money flow doesn't stop, and then there's the 40 hour visit to the local Children's hospital to address CU-4's on going jaundice issue, that may now be cleared up. (We're now waiting for UTI tests to come back, and schedule new blood tests and MD appointments for Monday.)

Can't say my life is ordinary now can I?

Still waiting, and all that

I wish I knew what I was doing. After three children, one would kind of think so, though that apparently is not the case here. I'm having a few symptoms that send me running to the Internet, which in turn, inflames my worries of delivery. My bad!

Tomorrow's back to the MD for the weekly check-up. I'm hoping she'll say enough to the pain and suffering (DH's ;-) having to listen to my perpetual whining and complaining) and send me to the hospital post haste, though part of me does not believe this will happen.

Oh well.

On a happier note, I heard that there are six weekends of winter left. How's that grab you?

Deal or no deal?

Oh boy, I just did something very scary. I sent my D-XH requesting the presence of CU-1 and 2 at the birth of CU-4 if it is on his time (thanks to DH's interpretation of the arbitration agreement. We were looking up information on another matter ...).

I do appreciate DH's support on this matter. He knows how important it is to me to have family near. I'm almost speachless and now worried about this twist as I can come up with extra scenarios to how this thing is going to roll out, or not roll out ...

Ok. So the request is out to the universe. And the universe says deal or no deal?

Last posting of the year

Well, where to start but at the ending.

It's been another year passing and I don't have a lot of insight into where everything fits into place.

I don't even have anything really thought provoking, inspiring, or maddening to close off this year.

DH is in bed with the cold I'd been manifesting over the last two weeks. He's more like a ghost, drifting in and out of the bedroom. You never know when he'll appear.

CU-1 and CU-2 are off to the DXH for 12 days. It was a tearful goodbye for all of us. CU-1 didn't start to loose it until CU-3 sunk against a wall and started to pout.

We've all got something to look forward to in 2007. We're hoping for the safe and healthy arrival of CU-4. We're hoping for quick, clean and inspired space from the renovation we've signed off on. We're hoping for health and enough of everything for people we love, influence, or brush up against. We're hoping for new beginings for those who need to change direction in his or her life. And we hope for continuity of the same for those who are right where they want to be.

I'd like to close out this year with a special thanks to a few of you who have been pivotal in acting as a spotter through some of the heavier parts of 2006. PC, Grandma C, and Motsa, without getting overly sentimental, thanks for caring for me. Without friends like you, my enemies would have had a bigger snack. I hope I can do and be the same for you in 2007.

;-)

It seemed like such a good idea at the time

Could this be the catch phrase for 2007?

Quand le pére noel vien nous visiter

What a surprise this morning. Not only did Pere Noel come over night, he made a personal visit this morning.

CU-2 was out playing with one of her toys, and saw him coming up the street! With a face splitting grin, she invited him in.

Aren't we lucky!

And CU-2s direct response to greeting Pere Noel? He smells good.

I saw Santa's dry cleaning!

Must have been getting ready for his flight tomorrow night. I heard from Transport Canada that he passed his medical examination and got his pilot license updated.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus!

I am gobsmacked.

I am just gobsmacked.

Within a span of 10 minutes I just spent a ton o'money, got a stollen item returned, and found my Christmas cards!

At 10 minutes to five, I found an article on the back pages of our local community paper that talked about a gymnastics club that was in our neighborhood. IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD! This one would allow CU-2 to climb and jump and learn how to use equipment that she wanted to learn how to use. The price isn't light, but, well, that's what they make credit cards for now, isn't it.

Right after, I'd no more then hung up the phone then I got a call from a food back in our neighborhood. CU-1's back pack had been turned in and a guy was offering to deliver it ...

Right after that, DH called to say we got 90% funding for our construction project and we were GREEN GREEN GREEN to go.

I'm gobsmacked, thrilled and so thankful to God for these blessings.

I figured the tide must have started to turn when we got our Christmas care package from out West, followed by Aunt J's from the warmer parts of North America.

Praises be.

Update: Just as I was posting this entry, CRASH! BOOM! landslide of stuff behind me. In that landslide, on top of everything that got turned over, are the Christmas cards I'd been thinking about and looking for and had planned to pull out a full search on over this weekend.

Thank you spirits of the season. You've blessed this house.

Winter poem

Winter, a poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre

"SHIT its Cold!"

A sad day in Muddville

For any of you who read regularly, or have regular contact with my household, you'll know that the really great streaks of luck never last too too long. Thus, when this last one started, oh about six weeks ago, I found it very exciting, but also was left wondering when the pail of water would hit the fan and spray everything.

Well, today was that day.

It all started off early. CU-1 hadn't done his work in class, so it was sent home. We worked a bit on it last night, but he clearly needed to apply himself more. Sooo, at six this morning, I woke up with a rubber snake in my face, and started the day trying to coax out answers about primary numbers and which had multiple dividers.

Surviving that, and getting ready for work in seven minutes, and to work only 35 minutes late (and having stand on the bus because people are inconsiderate here, especially during the morning rush hour), I get in only to get a call from DH that CU-1s back pack's been stollen from the school grounds.

Apparently he'd left it at the door he regularly lines up for at school, and accompanied CU-3 to her day care. Upon his return, it was gone.

So, I cancelled my morning meeting, called my boss saying I had to go, and headed back towards home.

CU-1 was stirred, though not too terribly shaken (more upset that he lost his J'aime lire (including the new one) then loosing his lunch, home work, or text books). I talked to his support teacher and explained the situation, and tried to get the ball to replace stuff. (By the end of the day, it doesn't look like anything happened. We all have to wait for his grade teacher to get better and return to the classroom).

So I drop by home, pick-up a replacement back pack, lunch bag, and snack for after school to give him a sense of normalcy, call the bank to cancel the cheque that was in his agenda for his previously lost text book, and headed out the door.

At work, I rescheduled the missed meeting, attended a webinar, and then tried to concentrate on overdue workflow diagrams for another project when I get THE CALL.

It was DH saying that CMHC denied our request to extend our mortage to cover the addition we've been working towards for the last two months. A roller coaster of emotions tries to rush through me. I'm too ... numb? at this point. It's been a rough weekend/week (CU-1 had his winter hat stollen, DH lost his glasses, CU-2's Brownie pins went missing, CU-3s feet grew so now we have to get her new shoes).

Last call into DH earlier this evening, before he headed into his next-to-last class is that all may not be lost. Apparently the appraiser didn't inlcude some paperwork with our request for assessment. The mortgage broker is resubmitting to see if it makes a difference.

What's kind of funny about this all is that every time I see a bus going the opposite way that I'm going, I get an urge to get on board. :D

You can lead a horse to water

Tonight was a marathon night. Homework, crime and punishment (not homework related), and drop-offs in a 1 to 14 km radius. Thank small gawds DH borrowed the voiture from the Mothership. (Why is another story. He goofed and is trying to make ammends.)

So, drop-offs, 1, 2 and 3 go without a hitch. Drop-off 4 is at the end of the line, around a corner, turn East, turn West, kiss the one you love the best.

We had good directions for the most part. Got us right to the turn off, in the end. This wouldn't be a blog-worthy story if it weren't for the but now would it. DH, in his unusual forsight decided to look up directions on MapQuest.

MapQuest, in its infinite wisdom pointed the turn off as being on the left side of the road. Destinee's directions clearly stated make a right-hand turn. And there began the fun. Me yipping at DH that the school grounds are a marker, not the final destination. Him cranking back "MapQuest said ...".

Bah.

Now this is the proper way to fight :D.

CUs 1 and 2 (of "My three dads" fame), take note. I'm sure the alternative Dad (AD) 1 and 2 don't fight this way :D.

The good, the bad, the ugly

A lot of good has been happening lately. I feel like the universe has it in for me in a good way.

Plans for domestic redevelopment are moving along as quickly as possible, and in our favour. It's a short week because there's a PD day Friday, which means that CU-1 and CU-2 will be home tomorrow night! In celebration, I'm taking those two to Happy Feet. CU-3 will go to day care for the day.

The bad? I had to out myself today at a meeting. Hi my name is **** and I'm the President of the Chapter. Arg. And my boss was there. Kind of embarrassing. Now she wants to put it in the internal newsletter. Didn't help that the talk was about marketing self and services ;-)

The ugly. The Ex. Parent-teacher meetings that I can't confirm the times to (because the CUs aren't with me this week), multiple calls, and notes to the school to clear things up and find out that I'm one of their more active parents and don't need to come to the meeting. :D

Hurray and one for the good gals!

The poetry of the French language

In the last two days, I learned more about bodily functions and how to express them in the most poetic way.

CU-2 wrote in a science test a remark about the success and importants of "les dêchets de vache" for flowers and the earth.

CU-1 complained to me that there were "tracs de prunes" in the microwave and thus couldn't warm up his grain bag.

As much as I like the poetry in the language, I don't think these descriptions will help me pass my language tests.

Migration

Attention! Attention! Migration has begun! Winter can't be that far away with the influx of the North Chickens!

Lesser of two ills, or Lord of the Flies wasn't so bad

"Whose turn is it?" I mumble as I try to lift my cotton-filled head.

"Yours", he replies.

Agh. I take a roll-and-swing to lift my aching bodies out of the bed to attend to CU-3s request for a "bay-gil".

Yes, it's the lesser of two ills weekend again. Both DH and I (and to a much lesser extent CU-3 are sick again. Alas, when we finally get our flu shots at the end of the month, it may be for not.)

We seem to be a very efficient lot, mostly getting sick on weekends, feeling ok enough to wander into work when Monday rolls around.

It's almost noon and the fuzzy headed huz is just rizing. He's insisting on getting up to insulate a little-used door. Oh no, I can't do it for the family, the he-man (who rarely got sick prior to this year) has a special way he wants to do it this year. Oh well. At least it will get done.

As for me, I'm getting caught up on laundry, sort of. Sitting folding socks doesn't take that much energy, though, watching Dora L'exporatrice and Max et Ruby for the fourth time in a row because I can't get up to find/wrestle the remote from the 2 year old is getting kind of trying.

CU-3 is in her glory. You want to eat halloween candy for breakfast and lunch? Go right ahead. Standing for the 2 minutes to wait for the bagel to toast has taken a lot out of me.

Lord of the Flies has nothing on me.

Hallowed weenies

Well, Halloween is over for another year. I found it to be a bit anti-climactic; a bit too rushed for my liking. It all started up at 5:15 p.m. and was over by 7:30 with all ghouls accounted for.

Doesn't help the spirits to know that CU-1 and 2 both have two tests each this week, and CU-1 and I usually spend a couple of hours doing the review (sounds excessive I know, but if you really knew and saw what was going on ... it really boils down to 1.75 hours telling CU-1 to stop playing with the cat, teasing CU-2 and 3, fiddling with this and that.)

DN (dear neighbor) came over to throw candy at the kids for us while DH and I prowled the neighborhood with "the spider", the red-and-black modern lady, and "the-visitor-from-the-spirit-world". They had a great time, though we didn't cover nearly as much ground in previous years, so the haul isn't as great. (That's just perfect with me. I'm looking for the children to have the experience of dressing up and running around with friends, then spending more time in the dentist's chair or on a treadmill later in life.)

We had about 100 revelers (98 but who's counting). Some without costumes, and well beyond their teenage years, though reports are that there were fewer then last year.

We also got some good feedback on the decorations. I figure it's just a warm-up to the winter installation. :D

All Saints Day followed with good, then bad, then good then bad, then neutral bits of news, a real roller coaster of stuff.

I found out that one of CU-3's teacher's has had a rough Fall with her FIL and her brother both passing away within two weeks of one another. She's holding it together very well. (I'd be a wreck.)

We also got the quick estimate from one of the contractors for a proposed rebuild of part of our modest house. Let me just say the price was immodest and a bit over the top. DH and I are going to start with pre-Christmas celebrations by trying to find places to trim the budget to make it more palatable to bankers from whom we need to seek a loan or new mortgage.

On the positive side of the register, for the first time this year, CU-1 got a red note in his agenda, and it wasn't berating his abilities, or lack there off. His teacher actually acknowledged that Georges was making a little effort to work in class and that she was pleased with that. Though, as backhanded complements go, the zing was that he still struggled during lecture time.

I guess I'm having an Oscar moment where I'm just grateful he was nominated.

But seriously, all things considering, it's swell that she tossed him, me, that bone. I appreciate the little enthusiasm she could muster. CU puts in the butt-in-chair-time that got him to this point and, reinforced by my not-so-idle threats (no books, no trips to the library, reduced computer time, and generally an unpleasant existence for the week he's home, and then there's the threat to go sit in class with him) are not falling on deaf ears.

CU2 and 3 are noticeably jealous of the time I spend with him, so I try to balance it out during weekends, and other times when it can be fit in. Time with CU1 isn't always fun and games and an whole lot of fighting goes on, so I can't see what there is to be jealous of. I *really would* like to watch Dora L'exploratrice or Sixteen with you, rather then reviewing geography or the multiplication tables.

But, that's the life I lead. With the exception of a few bumps along the way, it’s a good life.

Besides, it's just one more sleep to coffee night with Perpetual Chocoholic. Woo hoo.

Another Sally Field moment

Sally Field has nothing on me.

They like me, they really like me! My fist words in the door after coming back from an unplanned presentation where I feel like I pooped spray-painted golden nuggets (to be crass and graphic).

DH lifted his weary head off the sofa, blurry eyed from fatigue. “Oh, of course dear.”

Oh the enthusiasm.

I was high as a kite. Nothing bothered me. I had patience galore. Love and honey was running through my veins, even though CU3 was having night terrors and was being totally unreasonable, and other sheet storms were brewing.

Alas, thank small gawds for those rose-coloured glasses!

From the annals of the "Do I really want to know?" stories

So I'm working on this big report that is overdue, (It's for a volunteer group of which I am President, so it's really no biggy, except that the Newsletter Editor would hunt me down on Monday if I don't cough something up.) when I get the call: "Lovely, darling, mystical, amour of my life" (that's not really what DH said - it's what he meant though. Something gets lost in translation when he yells "X*X*!"

And so it goes ... he keeps yelling, followed by "You've got to come see this."

My typical response is "Do I really want to know?"

"Nope."

Ok, so that peaks my curiousity.

I follow his voice into our bedroom. There, sitting in the middle of our bed is my angelic CU-3 covered from neck-to-toe is sun tan lotion. Not only is she covered in blue lotion, so are our newly changed sheets, pillow cases, and heavier winter bedding ...

Now I wished I'd chosen Coppertone lotion ... at least I'd have enjoyed the fragrance all that much more.

Thanks for giving

It's the Canadian Thanksgiving weekend and I've spent the better part of it running around.

Relatives are in town, sort of (I hour outside the city at a centralized summer home to be exact). DH, CU3 and I spent Saturday barrelling out to spend a couple of hours with the sibs and cousins. Eight hours was pleasant, and seemed to be just the right amount of time before the pleasantries of a close-knit family started to break down and cross lines. (The topic of CU1 and 2's father, and divorce seem to be a no no at family gatherings. I will have to remember that if we attend the proposed week-long family reunion next August.)

Sunday again was running around. This time to attend to DH's winter covering needs. His very nice, and medium-expensive, one year old 3-in-1 coat gave up the ghost some time on Saturday. I coaxed him into foraging at one of our local malls (that I seem to go to once a year). We made it out with a cheaper version of the 3-in-1 (this being a 1 in 1). I don't have high hopes for this coat. I do hope it will last him the winter though. We came home before picking out a second, more rugged coat as he thinks CU3 decided to share the love, and her amazing head cold.

Short and sweet, we made it home on an express bus only to plunk CU3 in front of the visual child restraint so that we could catch a few zzzs before preparing for an early evening wedding.

The wedding was beautiful, tasteful and most of all entertaining. It was an intimate gathering of 50 of the bride and grooms mostly family, peppered with a few friends. Dinner wasn't rubber chicken or turkey as I'd feared, all because the groom is deathly allergic to birds (I'd forgotten this point and was dreading the reception).

Upon departing, I shared these sentiments with the bride and groom: "when I get married again, I'm having you plan the event".

The bus ride home was uneventful. CU3 crashed in her crash cart just before we got off the bus. Putting her to bed had to be one of the easier times this year.

Monday's here now, DH is spouting off that we have to get our a**es in gear because Halloween's almost here and there's not enough time in the day.

Ah, yah right. Ok.

More on that to follow.

*****

And to all those people who sneeze into their hands then touch all the support poles and door handles as they leave the bus, thanks for giving.

Just don't ask me how I'm doing.

WARNING: Rant ahead.

Don't ask me how I'm doing. Don't tell me to smile, especially if you have no idea what's going through my head or my life right now. These are just two mistakes people made today.

Since school started, CU-1's teacher has been adding notes to CU's agenda. Notes in red; usually about CUs comportment (or lack there of). This has become an almost daily occurance, though handily, I only get half the brunt of it as CUs father is supposed to pick up the slack at the other end.

Lately though, there's been a distrubing trend arising from the notes. CUs not completing his homework for the week ... half the time ... this I just don't get. It's not impossible to hold CU to task, it's merely difficult and requires a bit of effort on a parent's part. Yet the theme persists.

Ok. So, it's a given that there are different parenting styles.

In the end CU gets all the homework assigned for the week he's home, and any other stuff that is outstanding from the previous week.

What's more troubling are the comments coming from ex-DH that it's a school issue. Ahhhhhh. Can't quiet see that logic, however, I did have to be have crazy to go along with it before. So, back to it's a given that there are different parenting styles.

So, next issue - coordination of decision making.

One of the CUs requires medicine on a regular basis. Certain attributes, when observed appearing in a percistent state, trigger a need for review of this CUs dosing. So, this state is present. Observations are communicated. Things become implied. A simple directive from the MD gets twisted and who knows where we are now, except to say the symptoms remain unattended at this time.

Next issue - pending CU 4's registration for the daycare across the street.

In the City's infinite wisdom, they've amalgamated a child care registry which provides parents with wider access to available child care resources. So, this means I have to register the unborn in order to try to communicate with my neighbors across the street to reserve a place for CU 4 10 months from now. I'm actually ok with the paperwork.

The problem comes from the message on my answering machine where someone decided to correct my due date and my return to work date ... they believed I did a typo when I put down 2007 for both dates. Er, no I didn't. The dates are indeed correct (no matter how absurd they appear to you.)

And on it goes and goes and blows.

I haven't even made it to the insurance snafu, cookie collection details that have gone AWOL, three hours of homework supervision (between two CUs while being interfered with by another CU), MDs message to call back and when I do the office is closed early, and a France-French teacher who's starting to bring back my nightmares of Grade 7-8 French with Madame Morris.

Oh the life I lead.

End of rant.

For a better reading time, I recommend this.

PS: PC if you're reading this. I may not be up to par, but I need a drink. Make mine a double (laté or tall, or what ever the thing is called now!)

That's when I knew

I've been reading a book by Po Bronson that I've found helpful. It's all about other family's stories.

I can't remember when or where I heard about the story. I do know that occassionally, I win the lottery in the library pool and it's my turn to read a book that I've put on request ages ago.

I like Mr. Bronson's style of writing. I like his approach to documenting other people's lives. I've seen bits of my life reflected in several of the stories that he recounts in this volume.

One thing that reading this book has done is provolk thoughts about my intuition, instincts and how things in my life have just happened ... usually good things ... Like the time I was pregant with CU-1. It was early Spring. I was heading into exams, panicked about money as my source of income was drying up and ex-DH's work was on rocky ground. I was talking down Elgin, near my home at the time, trying to hold back the sobs while talking to my walking companion.

I was on the verge of whailing when I almost screamed out "I just need a sign; a sign that everything is going to be ok."

As she offered sincerely felt "there theres" and "everything is going to work out", I happened to glace left. There, through the freezing rain, I saw what appeared to be a book in the bushes. (Being a former practicing librarian, I have a special place in my heart for orphaned information of varying media and have been know to stop for a free daily newspaper in distress.) I looked again. It was a book.

I just happened to have a bag in my pocket and fished the book out of the bushes into the bag. As I did so, I glanced at the title Chicken soup for the soul ... I knew then that as difficult as I was finding thesuggestion of the proposed transition, I was going to be ok.

***

Speed forward 10 years.

Earlier this summer, I had a scare after a regular pregnancy check-up. No fetal heart beat.

I had to trek half-way across town to get an ultrasound ... felt more like hell's half-acre by the time DH and I figured out that the road stopped and then started again at a different point.

While making the trek (getting panicked because the timing was close and this was an ultra sound ... think water, and lots of it), I started to slow down ... or maybe DH speeded up. He walks fast. As I stopped to get a rock out of my shoe. I saw something to my left ... a bib. A blue bib that had got caught up in the tall grasses. I fished it out, and tucked it in my back pack.

At that point, I found calmness. I found answers to many questions. I knew, once again, that everything would be ok.

Horoscope for the week

Concentrate. Focus. Think hard. Chocolate. Pay attention. Work. Detail. Diligence. Sex. Responsibility. Commitment. Dedication. Hippopotamus...' It is not always easy to keep our minds fixed on a single matter. We are bound to be distracted and it is inevitable that events will oblige us to divide our time. Do not be too hard on yourself if, this week, you cannot achieve all you want to. Just do your best.

Sounds about right ...

Last laugh

Looks like the last laugh is on me. The virus turned out to be our router that needed to be reset. Sigh.

A big week of running around is behind me. And a lot of paperwork. Announced the impending arrival of CU-4 through an early Christmas letter for those who don't already know, and, well, for whom I don't necessarily want to have to gauge their reactions through voice-to-voice contact.

The first day of Fall has arrived and we spent it out at the Motherships' cottage. Getting out of the city was terrific and I just about pulled off a cordial weekend, until I received a last minute dig which resulted in me turning an equality sharp retort. Oh well.

DH is in a pseudo-panic tonight as he's got a BIG MEETING at work later this week. (This is for a job he started only three weeks ago, and yet feels a huge amount of responsiblity for.) I'm looking at the week with mixed feelings ... kind of like a hamster on a treadmill.

Wah

Looks like there's a virus going around on the web. I've got denial of service to add pictures to here or to my photogallery. I can't access remote mail to get out a timely email for some volunteer stuff. I can't get confirmation that some one else is getting denial of service because of well-deserverved fatigue on my colleagues part. I'm feeling generally frustrated having just spent my evening with CU-1 completing homework he didn't do in school (and he still didn't touch this week's homework for the night).

Wah wah wah. Get the wah-mbulance! ;-)

Rolled up socks

I once heard/read that a marriage could withstand the loss of a child, but could not withstand the dirty, rolled up socks behind the sofa. Now I know what that insightful person was talking about.

Sharing the house with four other "room mates" life gets interesting when their standards of cleanliness don't match. Worst even is having to tidy up after these dust bunnies before actually doing any further tidying or arranging or finding stuff that's over due, needed for school, or required as result of a seasonal change.

I'm currently facing that frustration - three missing books, though down to two now (one registering a library fine as we speak, the second book starting to tick up the pennies in two days), a seasonal handbag change cannot take place as THAT is missing. New mitten clips will probably have to be purchased because I can't place my hands on last year's. On on it goes.

Doesn't help that we had the "help" of an extra house keeper last week who has her own sense of order. (Last time that happened, I found the library books mixed in with our books ...).

All this makes me wonder what's going to happen in, oh, about four months. Order out of chaos? I don't think so.

Rainy days and cold nights

I love rainy days.

I love curling up somewhere cozy with a mug o'tea, sitting in the partial darkness, listening to slow jazz.

Alas, I live in an expanding and contracting household where those values are not always shared, but that's beside the point.

The point is that it's not rainy tonight, but a bit cooler. Fantastic sleeping weather (when I don't nap the day away). And tonight I'm sitting in the glow of the computer, with a mug o'tea, listening to sloooooow jazz. What a luxury.

DH, who has started a new job that results in him being home by 6 p.m. EVERY NIGHT (wahoo!) which means that there's a bit more support (and gourmet hot dinners that I don't have to cook!) It also means that he's had the opportunity to play Ward Clever a bit more at home with the CUs.

Last week was a dry run with all three CUs. Not bad at a first attempts. This week, it's just CU-3. Being just over 2.5 years, it seems that it's her job to do QA on the household. What are the boundaries? What can she do to break the system? Every night it's a different stress test. She's going to be a very good software tester if she perceivers.

However, much to her shagrin, DH has written clean bed time code. Now it's a story, a song, a bit of back rubbing, and a kiss goodnight.

He's reduced his run time from two hours down to a reasonable 15 minutes. Wow. I actually get to see DH, and sometimes, if I'm very lucky, I get my own turn down service!

Long time, no type

It's been a while since I've been on. I chalk it all up to summer time.

Things just go in an entirely different direction when there are no schedules to follow. (Maybe retirement is like that?)

It's been hot, smoking hot where I am. It's made things a wee bit difficult. I probably should have spent my time blogging during those long, insomnia-filled nights. Oh well, instead, I spent the time fanticizing about house redesign.

Is this the nesting instinct coming through? Perhaps, though doubtful. I've been day dreaming about adding on and modifying our little cottage home since buying it. I love the neighborhood and neighbors. I even like the house very much. I think I'm a renovator at heart. (I LOVE Flip that house!)

We renegotiate the mortage next year, which may put some gas under DH to at least come up with a wish list, if not actually prompt him to start his wish list and look into what it takes to get the proper permits.

Dream on eh?

Not all that blooms is in the garden

CU-3, though just two, is imprinting heavily on me. I am finding her personality is a hybrid between those of CU-1 and CU-2.

Although I do believe that the books that say it is unfair to compare children have something, I may have found an exception, when done kindly. CU-3 is part of a "blended" familly (though I tend to think we are much more of a tossed salad). So I find it absolutely intriguing to see traits come through of her siblings, like her physicality, like CU-2, or love of books, like CU-1. Her humor outputs is very much like CU-1 which endears me to CU-3 even the more as she puts her own twist on things.

Comme je dit chaque chances que j'ai "Vous etes mes cadeaux."

Not such a slow news day

It's not for the lack of wanting to keep people up to date that I haven't been writing.

With stiffling heat, a CU-3 who doesn't want to go to bed until WELL after her bed time, and general fatigue (see first entry), trying to get to the computer has been a trick.

For those of you who subscribe to the picture is worth a thousand words department, head over to the picture posting area to catch up on July's entries.

X doesn't always mark the spot

I knew it was a winning streak that couldn't continue forever. Work life is going very well, and I'm getting positive attention. Home life is going well. I've been able to give CU-3 positive attention, until now.

For about a month now I've started to take this whole potty training thing in earnest, following CU-3 around, constantly nagging her if she has to pee. Success. I'd found the key. It was working so well. I took it up a knotch. I started having her go commando. More success. Until ... tonight ...

X (formerly known as CU-3) marks the spot, on one chair, on another chair, and .... IN MY BED! My bed!! What possessed this beautiful creature of my loins to pee in my bed! ON MY SIDE! I'd heard of cats and dogs taking it out on their owners when they were not happy. Is this the same not-so-subtle comment to something I've said and done?

So, I got a little mad ... called her rotten baby and kind of yelled at her telling her she should know better now that she's two! Oh well. A lot of water under the bridge (and sofa, and bed, and chair ...).

Now that the world knows, maybe I'll never have another visitor?! Or they'll all take to the floor. (But that's not safe either! ;-)

Why

I'm keeping the prospects of CU-4 slightly under wraps. I'm letting it be broadly know to hill and yon, with the exception of announcing this to a few who are very very close to me. I haven't told CU-1 or 2 yet for concern that they will, inturn, tell their Father.

My ex-DH and I do not have a good relationship, and, well, if how he took the coming and subsequent birth of CU-3 is any sign, I better be braced for the worst.

I don't write about X-DH frequently. There's not much of a point to do so. He's who he is, and, well, there are a whole lot more pleasant and fun news to pass along to friends and family. That being said, I throw out this question to the universe:

Why. Why would he act as he does in the name of love?

A Sally Field moment

They like me! They really like me!

About an hour after coming back from the cottage, surveying the damage of not tending to the garden now for about two weeks (between the nausea of stooping, big rain storms, and just general blahs), a familiar looking fellow redish brown hair, full beard, slight pot belly and black shorts came up to me. For a minute, I thought my DH had changed into something a lot more casual. It turns out that it was our super shy neighbor from across the street who came over to say that liked my unusal garden. Well, if truth be told, that made my day. (And sent me back in to override the blahs to pull 30 minutes work of quack grass.)

It was love at first sight

Today, during a very personal close up, I got to meet CU3.5, not due for a full number until early 2007.

I saw the heart beat. 141 beats per minute. I'm in complete and utter awe.

Fish food in the bath tub

"Why is there fish food in the bath tub" CU2 patiently asked her Papa tonight.

CU2 had strongly expressed her opinions of bathing with CU3 who now has a notable reputation for loosing control at inopportune times. Apparently this one was one of them.

I learned of this incident as I returned from a recon missing with CU1 - it was a bit of mother-child bonding that we'd not had in a long long time. (We found some good garden editions!)

Poor CU2. Scarred for life.

There's lots to write about

But I'm too tired.

Weather has been great, so great that the garden needs my attention.

The children have been great, so great that they don't need my attention, thus allowing me the opportunity to attend to my garden.

However, none of that is really happening. Instead I'm going out on regular walks around my hood taking photographs. It's become my new addiction.

For those of you who do read this blog and like a riddle, here's one for you.

He shoots, he scores.

Ureka! The age old question is answered

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

http://edition.cnn.com/2006/TECH/science/05/26/chicken.egg/index.html

Has the Artistic Enhancer come out of retirement?

I asked myself this the other day when I was the recipient of an unexpected mental health day. (CU-3 was showing "flu symptoms" and was in quarintine for 24 hours. I still chalk it up to too much apple juice in the system.)

I was puttering through the garden while CU-3 puttered in her sand box and had the greatest of pleasures to find a few, unexplained treasures ...

To the anonymous contributor: Thank you for the good surprises. I usually don't like surprises. These are very very pleasant.

steamy situation

overheard on the bus today ...

"Oh yah, she had to go in for another ultrasound."

"Eh, really? Why?"

"They want to make sure she doesn't have a tropical pregnancy."

Moms

I just don't know how Mom's do it. They're always working. It doesn't matter where they work, or for whom, the bottom line is that usually they keep doing it until the job is done, especially when all others have abandoned the activity.

Hats off to you ladies!

What came in the e-mail ...

BEFORE I WAS A MOM

Before I was a Mom I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.
Before I was a Mom
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom I had never been puked on.
Pooped on. Spit on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.

I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Starting off the week with a bang

Well, CU-2 had her first communion and I was there to witness it. With that event passing, it seemed that CU-2 didn't think that was enough of a bang for her. I got a call to come to her school this morning as her Father was not reachable. She'd had had an accident.

By the time I got there, her Father'd checked in and was on his way.

Turns out she'd fallen off a play structure (probably not using it as the structure was intended). Fractured her right wrist/arm area, as far as I can tell. (Information will not be forthcoming until Friday when the children cross over.)

CU-2 was one upset little girl. Worried about getting hurt more. I haven't been able to connect with her directly. I missed her call tonight. I did hear that she picked out a blue waterproof cast that's coming off later this month.

I'll get the low-down more, when she's home Friday.

Je t'aime my belle.

XX Maman

Reality - that is just for the rest of you all

I think I live in another world.

This weekend, my DH and I spent the weekend puttering around the house. I fitted a 1.5 ft pond in the front yard, complete with fairy lights. I moved the train and barn to the side of the yard where CU-3 might find them again. Nessy is still in the front yard and I am waiting for more yard sales or a few mongo adventurers to update and fresh the yard.

Je ne suis pas un écureuil

The other day I had to find CU-1. He was so deeply engrossed in his GameBoy game that I thought he'd have the bends coming back up.

"Repeat after me "Je ne suis pas un écureuil."

"Quoi maman?"

"Je ne suis pas un écureuil."

A slow gin grin crawls across his face. His dimple drills into his cheek as he shuffles to the bathroom and picks up his clothes behind the door.

When nagging a child, there is room for humor.

Bad chocolate? Never

Ever hear of bad chocolate? I haven't. That is until I got some "sale" chocolate. Left over stuff from Easter.

I decided to share it with my good friend who has a specialty in the subject area. Sharing the box over a cup of coffee and a heartly laugh, she carefully made her first choice.

"Tastes like mothballs."

What? I said as I crunched down on a particularly hard peach creme.

As she took another that looked a bit more promising, I surveyed the tray, trying to match up the legend.

"This one tasts like urine." "

Urine? How do you know what urine tastes like?" Wait. I don't want to know ...

Evidence

Exhibit A




















and Exhibit B















BUSTED!

This would explain why there's never toilet paper for me to use!

Luck

I think it's time to buy a lottery ticket as I figure I'm one of the most lucky people I know. Really, now, what are the chances that if the toilet paper roll is going to be empty, it'll be on my visit?!!

I am the very model of a modern major-general

I fell like I've been shaken, stirred and poured out of a Gilbert & Sullivan musical.

Things started off nicely this week, just as in their jingles, and then it speeds up and speeds up and speeds up.

With a short work and school week before me, I was sincerely hoping that the teachers would take pity on the children and given them a light load this week. Nooooooo. CU-1 has two tests, a book report and his regular word list search. CU-2 has one test, and comprehension questions, not to mention Brownies this week. Then there's my second-language homework to do.

Toss in CU-3's theme for the week "A girl's gotta have fun" and it makes for an interesting mix.

Wouldn't change it for the world. As CU-2s been saying to me "Da da da da da, I'm loving it."

P.S. I'm wondering when she's going to figure out that R-O-L-A-I-D-S spells relief.

Slow news day

It's not like things have been slow at this end. Actually they've been pretty much racing along as usual. Stuff just seems to ordinary to report.

The weekend was lovely. _A lot_ of park time for the children. I think we went every day but today.

Easter was fun. I was remarking to my DH that it's not the same as it was when I was a kid. It's not that my parents went out of their ways to do anything unusual. There just used to be more formalness to the weekend (not doing anything except sitting quietly Good Friday, reflecting on the crusifiction until 3:00 p.m.) and then, of course, the bunny droppings on Sunday.

CU1, 2 and 3 got to collect their bunny droppings. CU-3 really didn't get into it like the other to. Still to young I guess. Though shouts of "bun bun" and "booooonnniiiee" could be heard regularly when she found the fuzzy plastic ones around.

DH worked Easter Monday, as I did, sort of. Crunch for my current employer is a special thing and is considered quiet voluntary (union says so). Sure beats working 12 to 14 hours six days a week as I did for my first employer in my current profession.

So I put in a bunch of hours today to help out a colleage on her project and will head into work early to do some more work.

I'm hoping it's a light homework week as I'm trying to catch up on many things: sleep and laundry being the top two.

It's going to be a heavy week because I have to facilitate a group at the end of the week (for which I have to prepare) and I've got two volunteer activities that are starting to flare-up and require my attention. (This should be interesting).

I can also discount next weekend as DH has three finals to write. That leaves him out of the picture for most of the week as he prepares for those.

Maybe we'll be lucky again next weekend and have a bit of warmth and sun which will allow CU3 and me to play outside. (This weekend I got some peas, lettuce and beats in ... we'll see if they actually take.)

I also took a heap of new pictures for those who are tracking that sight.

simple words

Free your heart from hatred.
Free your mind from worries.
Live simply.
Give more.
Expect less.

Adventures in parenting

CU-3. With her around, one would do best to eat one's Wheaties.

She's started to address her father by his first name. She's taught herself how to get out of her bed. She's also taught herself how to exit the front door. And let's not forget that she knows how to use a chair, stool, pile books, boots, lids, coats, back packs and anything else she needs to get to where she needs to be.

Tonight she went to the library, selected her reading materials, and took out her borrowers card ... all by herself.

For a treat, we stopped in at the park on the way home. She decided she didn't have enough fun (following one of my house rules "don't come home until you've had enought fun") and decided to give her papa a hard time. This lead to her deciding to run away from home (to the porch of the home across from the park). Her papa deciding to see what she'd do, walk to the end of the block and hid behind the tree. CU-3 saw her chance and headed back for the park. Oh, we're going to have a harder time in about 12 years ...

There is something in the water

It's CU-3, and CAT-3 wants some of what he's got.

In the last year we've fostered a few overaged kitten wannabes. She's the latest and greatest. Purrnella does tricks and has us all trained. One of the very special things is that she likes the freshest of water.

When we go by the bathroom, Purr is usually there waiting for some one to put the tap on for a trickle. She's got us humans trained really well as I frequently walk into the water closet to find the tap providing a steady stream and no one around to blame.

Well, tonight everyone was doing his or her own thing and not giving her a nevermind. She decided that she'd better take matters into her own paws and gingerly mounted the side of the tub, balanced, and extended her neck and head towards CUs tub water.

"Maman Purr a bu mon l'eau!"

Oh Purr, better be careful 'cause it's not bathtub gin!

Short fuses

I think there must be something in the water.

I was talking to a good friend last week who suggested she and her significant other wasn't right as rain recently. Tempers flaring, gnashing of teeth, fueled by ... who knows.

There's just been a lot of short fuses lately. I'm suffering (and suffering is the word) with such. I can't claim that it has to do with the cycle of the moon this time as that event has come and passed. I do wonder though if it has to do with events that occurred five years ago and that haven't quiet worked themselves out of my psyche ...

April 1 is an anniversary of sorts for me. It's five years ago on April 1 that my first husband and I said adios (actually, he said nothing ... his actions spoke clearly enough). As with my parent's divorce, it took me many many years to get through the wild and (what I thought) unpredictable mood swings during the few days around that anniversary. Now, almost 25 years later, the date passes without any notice.

I really hope to small gods that those whom I love dearly do not have to withstand these unwelcome trade winds for that long.