Honor thy father and thy mother

Honor thy father and thy mother. I was reminded of this statement while reading 10 Conversations You Need to Have with your Children.

What happens when that breaks down?

My DXH and I aren't together and we share in the lives of our older two children. Regrettably we do not see eye-to-eye on almost anything (I'm hoping that is less by design, and more the differences in our parenting style).

The older ones come home tomorrow, and with it, changes, chaos, laughter, and any other emotion that they've been working through in the last week. And there in is the rub.

Tonight I got a wee bit of the flavor of the week, having stuck around the school grounds a bit to take some winter cycle photos. The older two kids spill out of the school and catch my attention and start chattering at me. CU-1 has his hair died white again (a la Annie Lennox). I can deal with that. He's only been doing that since this kid was eight. It's CU-2 that's making my head spin, my stomach heave with anticipation ... the rage, the frustration.

In a matter of a few short minutes the feeling of creativity - to continue with my personal photo assignment, and of joy in the anticipation of their return tomorrow is drained while CU-2 starts the tantrum.

I quickly get a lecture. She sounds like her Father when she does that. No reasoning behind what she says. So, out comes the gush of verbal diarrhea. She hates her school. She wants to change. She wants me to call her friend to invite her to pizza night. She has to do everything herself. Her father hasn't followed up on a health treatment because he called the doctor and the doctor said ... Doctor? What doctor? I was at the doctor this week and there was no conversation. School issues? Huh? There's just not enough time to address everything in the short time we have while she passes between school and car. I barely have time to take a breath!

It's clear that she's angry with the inequality with how she is treated. (It's a known fact that the first born on his side of the family is the cream. Everyone else is second, and second is not the place to be.)

Oh Nelly, it's going to be a hell of a week.

Next story will be lighter. I don't want to be completely blowing my resolution so early!